Ah, the old Double-Up trick, eh?

OK here’s the thing sports fans. I’ve been meme-tagged twice in two days, and it’s the same tag. Both bloggers (Nik and Nibblybit) call for me to share seven facts about myself, some random, some weird, and then repost the meme-tag on seven other websites by leaving them a comment.

But both taggers have also told me no to stress. My compromise: tag seven new blogs instead of fouteen. The ol’ double-trick up, eh? It’s the second time I’ve used it this month…

Ahem…as for the 14 facts about myself, I’ll take that challenge.

  1. I used to be so flexible that I was able to suck my own dick. Despite the cliche about men, it wasn’t actually that great
  2. On a related note, I don’t really like fellatio. I love giving head but when it comes to my own thing, I’d rather have a hand-job with moisturizer any day
  3. I barrack for Everton FC in the English Premier League, for a reason I can no longer remember.
  4. I really like single malt whiskey, especially Laphroaig
  5. My favourite food is Vietnamese or Japanese
  6. I recently tried having sex to Burt Bacharach, and lost my erection
  7. I am six feet tall
  8. My semen apparently tastes like broad beans
  9. I once took magic mushrooms, and spent quite a long time hiding by a river bank, thinking I was a badger
  10. I have flown an aeroplane.
  11. I can play the bass riff to Smoke on the Water. No, not the guitar riff. The bass riff. It is easy.
  12. I have once actually seen a secret door designed to look like a bookcase.
  13. I have a long-standing crush on Julia Stiles
  14. I like Cohen Brothers films.

OK, here’s the taglist. Some favorites, some new folks, and one stipulation – they have to have posted this month. (There are a lot of dead blogs out there).

  1. Outside Vanilla
  2. Odysseus Bound
  3. Coquette in Bed
  4. Lady Emmalyn
  5. Wanderlux
  6. Nescio / Submissions
  7. Tales Erotique

So, now for the tagging part. Hey, if your in the list and want to pass this on, you have to post 7 things about yourself, link to me, then link to 7 new people and post comments on their sites to let you know you’ve tagged them.

Steve Mayhew.

Coming Up Soon: a Guided Tour of Lickorish.com.

I Got De-Tagged!!!

Another meta post. This one is about the fact that I just got de-tagged by WordPress.

That means I am no longer listed on WordPress global tags. At first I thought it might simply be because I had changed my theme, but no. It’s been quite a few days now since the reformatting and there’s no sign of any tag-browsing. I’m not on the femdom tag list where I should be.

My stats have plummeted, but not as much as they would have if this had happened straight away. There’s still quite a few folks coming in from other blogs, readers, or searches. Thanks to everyone who has linked me up…at least now I know the folks coming here have at least a passing interest in what I’m writing about.

Why do you think I was de-tagged? If you don’t want to answer that question, you can tell me what sort of stuff you’d like to see on here in the future. The poll serves either purpose…

Oh, I got tagged too, by Nik. Much nicer. More soon about that.

One last thing. Seeing as how WordPress have essentially hidden my blog from the public gaze, I see no further reason to have a ‘safe’ front page. I’ll just revert to a standard blog format, and have a warning in the corner, like everyone else does…

Steve.

A New Theme Already

I got sick of ‘Connections’ because one sidebar wasn’t giving enough prominence to my links and I wanted 3 columns.

I considred Digg 3 column but them my blog would look exactly like the Edge of Vanilla, so here I am with the slightly clunky new look. I might give it a week or two and see how it goes.

SM.

Happily (re)married

I found my wedding ring today. It had been lost for some time, or at least, I didn’t know where it was. She did, but I didn’t know that.

Anyway, when I put it on, we took the opportunity to renew vows. It wasn’t very serious, but it was fun, and in a way I enjoyed it a lot more than the stress and pressure of our real wedding day.

I’ll be making a longer post about D/s wedding vows in due course but just wanted to write something to mark the ocassion of the day itself, October 18.

Here is what was said (unscripted):

Me: “Michelle, will you put this on my finger?”

Michelle: “Yes.” (She does.) “You are now mine, to have and to hold from this day forward, as my cute little sub.”

Me: “OK.”

Michelle: “And you don’t have me to hold as anything. Suck on it.”

Me: “Right. Well, I promise to love, honour, serve and obey you from now until…you get sick of it, which may be never.”

Michelle: “Deal.” (She jumps on me, pushes me flat on the mattress and sticks my head in her armpit). “Now, I want you to know that me, my breasts, my armpits and my cunt are all very happy with you lately. It’s unanimous. The whole committee support you and want you to continue. You serve us very well. Now, go and make us cheese toast with tomato and basil.”

Me: “OK.”

Then she surfs on the net while I make her lunch. The ring is where it should be, now.

Incidentally, I’ve been waiting to have coital sex with her for ages. Tonight she wants me “up to my balls” in her, for ages and ages, while she just lies there. Her words.

I’m really happy with the way this is working out.

Personal Service School (with Kami Tora)

Indulge me while I engage in some blatant male-oriented femdom fantasy, inspired by fetish artist Kami Tora…

My oldest brother was chosen for the Professional Service job, and Dan, the middle brother, chose Physical Service. I was asked about Personal Service, and thought it sounded good. Our grandfather had done it, so there was a family tradition there, and everyone said it was a noble profession. Also, it was only a year, and then I could marry. So I said yes.

After high school ended, I had a month of freedom at the beginning of the summer. The only requirement was that I stay virgin. Everyone said I had better make the most of it, so I came every day, three or four times some days. My room stank of it. Looking back, that was bad advice. I would have been better off starting to train myself straight away.

Then came two months of “preparatory study”, which just means staying home and being locked in a device day and night. The first week was torture, but after that I got used to it. By the time they came to collect me and take me to my first inspection, I was almost disappointed to be let free. They left me wearing nothing more than a ring around my balls. (They never used any other device, after that).

They drove me and lots of other guys out to the camp and took us into a waiting room. The headmistress examined all of us one by one, and chose the ten students that showed the most promise. I just sneaked in at number nine.

Then we were taken down to the dormitory and allocated our rooms. They were plain and simple and soon felt like home. We were not allowed any TV or DVDs, sport, art, music, or reading material other than homework, and we could only wear plain, simple clothes. This sounds boring and restrictive but it was actually very peaceful and relaxing. My room at my new home still looks like that.

The other guys were all pretty quiet; there was none of the sort of mucking around that Dan told me about in the Physical Service barracks. We were all too busy trying to control our selfish thoughts, and also probably so zoned out on hormones most of the time we could barely think straight. None of us ever got much sleep.

Training began the next day. We had Basic Obedience, Fitness Training, Orgasm Control and Sexual Stamina, Kegel and Prostate, Oral Service, Massage and Masturbation, Female Anatomy, and a lame theory subject called From Oineda to Sutton and Beyond: A Herstory of Female Sexual Dominance, which bored the pants off us, or would have done if they weren’t already off most of the time anyway. That particular teacher was a chaste female and looked down on all the other teachers. No-one liked her much.

Basic Obedience was…basic. I am now obedient. I guess that’s why they called it that.

Oral Service was probably my favorite. The teacher, Ms. Peach, liked me, and gave me terrible marks all the way through the year as an excuse to keep me back after class for extra lessons. Then finally gave she me the highest mark in class right at the end of the year. Apparently she did this every year to her favourite student.

Massage and Masturbation sounds better than it was. The teacher for that, Ms. Lade, had pretty much dedicated her entire life to becoming the M and M teacher so she could get slave-boys to give her back, shoulder and foot rubs. Fortunately I was not her favourite. The guy who drew that particular short straw was this blonde kid called Merv. His arms used to ache all the time and he was always dropping things. I think after training, his mother married him off to a triathlete. Poor bastard.

Orgasm Control and Sexual Stamina, or OCSS, was the most important subject. You could fail other things and still get through, but you couldn’t get your Service Certificate without an OCSS pass. I wasn’t the best at it, so I wasn’t normally picked for Trainer demonstrations. That job fell most often to this guy Kyle, who ended up joining the traveling sexircus under the stage name Captain Never. Corny, I know, but I guess you have to keep it simple for the colonials.

But anyway, one day Kyle had the flu, and the teacher picked me at random to be driven across town to the Female Service Trainer’s College, where she used me to demonstrate the difference between a single refraction orgasm and repeating orgasm, and how to achieve both. She was really, really good at it. I met my wife that day but didn’t know til the next year.

At the end of the year, lots of us failed Kegel and Prostate. The test was whether you could provide a certain amount of fluid during a spot test. They tested us throughout the second semester; they’d just come up and ask you to do it. If you couldn’t fill the little vial, you failed. You needed four vials out of six attempts to pass.

The only problem was, there was this young assistant teacher called Ms. Honey who’d gotten herself assigned to Dorm Monitor because she had a milking fetish. She used to come into our rooms at night, tie us up and then fuck us dry while she dripped with pleasure.

We had to obey her so there wasn’t really much we could do. Six of us failed. I heard that the following year they caught her doing it and fired her. Our grades didn’t get changed, though.

Anyway, that was the only subject I failed. I went back home with my Certificate and found that there was already a trial date invitation waiting for me. One of the girls who’d seen me at the Trainer’s College wanted to meet in person.

I’m her husband now.

THE END

Want to read episode 2?

Disclaimers:

All images from The Kamitora Fanclub. There’s plenty more. Some of this artwork is actually from comics, but the narrative here is my own, although the theme is pretty transparent. I am aware that there is a strong incest theme in a lot of this artwork. I have ignored it. The pictures make me laugh, and glow…

I wish Georgie Tier did narrative work

Georgie Tier (1963-still not dead yet) is one of my favourite femdom artists. Her pictures show gloriously stylised views of women in full control of their own sexual pleasure, and totally capable of winning the submission of the man / men of their choice. Even her single-figure work is suggestive of dominance.

In this picture it’s…the look on her face. Hey, it’s a drawing and I want to serve her, far more so than any surly photograph of a domme with a cheesy leer on her face.

Anyway, I find myself wishing that artists like this would do narrative work – not necessarily a full comic book, but something with numerous panels featuring the same characters and arranged in order, possibly with some dialogue or descriptive text. Georgie actually has a degree in the comic-book style, and her work always suggests a story, but to my knowledge all her pictures are stand-alone works, or come in small series featuring three pictures of the same figure but with no direct narrative structure.

(I have not actually been to an exhibition so I could be wrong here).

Male comic book femdom art (like Eric Stanton) is OK for the narrative side of things, but I far prefer Tier’s work to look at. Maybe it’s just that I would rather see a woman’s stylised perception of her own (possibly real) sexual dominance than a man’s imaginings of a dominant woman. Namio somehow avoids this distinction for me, but for the most part, I prefer femdom art drawn by women than by men.

Only problem is, there is very little of it around, and not much with a narrative focus. Is it a male desire, to see the actions suggested in a single picture played out as a story over a range of scenes? Or is it just that work like this is actually hard to produce and each picture is lovingly designed, making the creation of a narrative sequence much more difficult than when an easy, cartoon style is employed.

In addition to her (very fine) pictures of gorgeous women whipping and pissing on men, there’s also some more tender scenes showing woman receiving domestic or erotic service which they are obviously enjoying immensely. This, in particuar, is one is one of my favourite pieces of femdom art.

My mind turns immediately to a 7-panel narrative sequence in which the woman is greeted at the door, poured wine, fed oysters, kissed, bathed, massaged, and then licked til she comes, after which the man is ridden like a horse and cropped for his reward. Just something about the style suggests that all that could easily take place….

Anyway, long live Georgie Tier. She no longer has her won site but her work is available from preview galleries at the World Museum of Erotic Art and the Art of Love. There’s also a great review of one of her shows here.

Hope you like these as much as I do.

Mayhew

This was also posted at Kinkysexlink.com.

Another food-related D/s t-shirt design

I think Michelle liked the t-shirt designs.

Last night I was lying on my bed masturbating and thinking about her (no really, it’s true). All of a sudden she barged in, stark naked, her tits staring at me like an extra pair of eyes, and said: “I’ve got another design for you. It’s a t-shirt you could actually wear. Design it.”

This is what she described, except I think she said it was supposed to be black, and have a cherry on top. think I might ask her to draw it just how she likes it. In the meantime…

SM